One of the challenges for authors is the difficulty of reaching a wide audience. In a world with trillions of stories it’s nearly impossible to float to the top and become visible. Add to that those writers who take the independent (indie) path to publishing and it’s even harder.

One thing that helps authors get into bookstores is if their book is available through library systems. If libraries carry your book, then a bookstore is more willing to take an author seriously.

So how does an indie author with no big publishing house/contract behind them get into a library system? One way is to spend money through places like Ingram Sparks. These are reputable organizations that review your book and help you go through the process of being added to library catalogs. I’ve gone back and forth about this because it’s hard for me to part with money.

Another option is to check your email one day and find out you’ve been added to the Indie Washington Program which puts indie authors into library catalogs in the state they live in. This is a program through the Office of the Secretary of the State of Washington Library system and part of something called Biblioboard. Each state has this program. Books are submitted, vetted, and hopefully added. Although not all library systems are part of the Indie Project yet.

This Deep Panic is now part of Indie Washington. I’ve been sitting on the news because I’m full of contradictory emotions and not quite sure if I’m excited or sad. So I decided to break those emotions down here.

Excited. Something I wrote is now available to library patrons. Fearful. Now more people will realize I’m not a very good writer. Ashamed. I’m not good enough to wear the label of ‘author’ so I don’t belong in this space. Discouraged. I haven’t been writing for personal reasons and now I’ll let people down. Pressured. I better figure out this angst and ask some new stories to come visit. A bit stupid. I know better than to listen to my cruel inner critic.

As you’ll see from the list above, there are far more negative emotions than positive. I’m working on that and the first step is confessing here that some people out there thought something I wrote, something that lived in my imagination, should be in a library.

That’s what I shall try to focus on rather than that damn inner critic’s voice. My friends and my husband are excited for me so I’ll fake it until I believe them. Promise.

And in case you’re wondering, all these photos were taken over the two days of filming the book trailer for This Deep Panic. Two perfect days with laughter and rain and friends and a silent inner critic.